The day I got over myself

This journey is happening. And while I set out trying to be super secretive and all hello self renewal, God had a different plan. Over the past couple of weeks I have struggled with I guess in my head-  rejection. I felt like so called friends had distanced themselves and that people who I had helped along the way had climbed up on the highest horse and forgot about who helped them when they were nobodies (excuse the emotion, I am just telling you how I felt.) So I tried to act like it did not bother me but I now know that it did. I was going through things and I wanted people to fix it for me. And I just couldn't understand why people were not jumping to help Ashley. So I decided to write a letter to God, different yes, but that is how him and I communicate along with prayer and it got me thinking, like man Ashley.  You are so hung up on everything around you and how people are treating or not treating you that you are forgetting who you live for. 

Well then I started listening to some pod-cast about God fixing the Hard things in Me. I eventually listened to a Pod Cast that talked about Set Yourself free from Yourself.. and that mixed with a hard look at my life and how I interacted with other people and how highly I thought about myself I realized that I NEEDED TO GET OVER MYSELF. A phrase that I use all the time is Girl Bye. And I had to say that to myself. I realized that nobody owed me anything and that although I felt like I had given people the world and my time that they wouldn't do the same and that they were not obligated to. I had prayed that I felt that there was a block in my heart and I realized that Bitterness and Resentment are what was blocking my heart and my passion. 

So here I am picking up the pieces and focusing on the call that God has over my life. I am realizing that although I felt like I lived this fantastic life and that although I had the audacity to think that things should be handed to me I realized that I needed only God. And that I needed to humble myself to the cross and serve God holistically and focus on the friendships that I do have and the direction that I am going in. 

What are you struggling with? In what area of your life do you need to be brutally honest with yourself and and how can you do it? Lets talk. 

Peace and Love Family.. 

xoxoxo -Ashley